character development

is it okay
that my left eyebrow doesn’t
match my right
and i’ve spent most of my forty something years
trying to figure out rules
by which i must abide
that the yellow pillow
at the back of my closet
is a reminder of my ex
who often said to me
that to have faith
he’d need us to have sex
that i can’t eat peanut butter
because i don’t want my
life to be short
but i’ll miserably overwork
and complain a lot
that i have savings worth lakhs
and a fixed deposit
i’m unwilling to break
but still need that 5k of cash
hidden under my fridge
every time i wake
that i don’t hang out much
with people my own age
because they have babies to look after
and i have my unsatisfactory wage
that my right limb is slightly
shorter than the one on my left
and i often think of spiders
crawling on both of them
that my shoelace isn’t black
it’s a really subtle grey
and that’s a private joke i laugh
at on every earthly day
that my books are unfinished
and my records i don’t play
meals i don’t refrigerate
and irrefutable words i don’t say
that the night doesn’t empower me
it’s the morning i chase
that i don’t use pens anymore
because i like to erase
is it okay
that my tea is always scalding
and undeniably burns my tongue
my cookies a little too salty
and my body too young.

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