Prison

It’s 12.45 AM
And this is a tribute post to the nights
That I spent trying to clamber out of my own thoughts
I was a prisoner then
AM a prisoner now
This prison however doesn’t get lonely
It’s a safe place to be
I created it when I had nowhere to go
It gave me everything it had
When I was on the run
But I was nasty, I didn’t even look at the night
I shut those doors at 10 pm, lights out at 10.05, by 10.15 I was done
The new life wasn’t tiring – it was just too much
And instead of saying that out loud, I kept mum
I didn’t think any good could come out of stepping out in the dark
In the aftermath of my small scale tragedy, I had lost sight of myself
Of my beliefs, rendering half a decade pointless
If you ask me, I’ll still underrate what it’s like
Putting yourself before the world
But in reality – it was an uphill ride
Where I pulled my own cart with nobody behind
I was loving the sweat trickling down my spine, knowing I was closer,
For hardwork was the only way I’d ever known
That, and reclusion
I was waiting to bleed for I remember never putting a bandaid on the wound
I guess it helps when you’re quiet and immersed in fright
I wouldn’t have done it any other way
In hindsight
My prison seems like a peculiar lifetime
Where I was a person I would now like to know

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